Half-holidays and Being ThankfulNov 23rd, 2012 | By Editorial Staff | Category: Nick Kemper's Blog
As I sit at the table, watching A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving, I am thinking: Aren’t most holidays good enough to be twice a year?
Why don’t we start doing this – create a half-holiday six months opposite the original? The whole point of a year is that it’s cyclical. A Halloween in April, a Thanksgiving in May, Christmas in June, New Year in July, Independence Day in January. Everyone could have a half-birthday as well. I’m not talking about gifts and merchandising – that can all be split or watered down. The food, family, friends, festivities – couldn’t we all use a little more of that? Don’t you find yourself sometimes wishing you could do something different on a holiday? Maybe you always go to grandma’s house for Christmas, but one year you’d like to stay home and enjoy the morning in your pajamas. Well, how about doing one in December, and the other in June? Or going trick-or-treating with the cousins in October, and with the neighbors in April? Maybe the half-birthday could be the day you do something special for your mom. After all, she was a major part of the birth, wasn’t she?
My daughter, when told about this idea, came up with: Why don’t we just have half-naked holidays?
And not to be too controversial, but if life starts at conception, why don’t we all have a Conceptionday? Imagine the celebration that could bring.
My niece had an assignment in school this week – one page of things she is thankful for. Wasn’t it hard to write a whole page, I asked her? Her answer: YES. Plus, her mom said she was writing tiny, and told her to write bigger. There’s something right there, I said. I’m thankful my mom suggested I write bigger so the assignment didn’t take so long.
This time of year, there’s a lot of attention given to things we are thankful for. We seem to always think of things we have or people in our life. What about the things we don’t have, or the people who aren’t in our life? I think it deserves some thought. (Please, let’s all agree, before we go further, to NOT be offended by anything that follows. Okay? OKAY?!? Thank you.)
• I’m thankful that I’ve never had to give myself a shot. So far.
• I’m thankful that I don’t have alimony.
• I’m thankful that I’m not a Yankee fan.
• I’m thankful that I haven’t made so many anti-Obama posts on Facebook that I had to unfriend myself.
• I’m thankful that I’ve never written a Geico commercial.
• I’m thankful that I’ve never fainted (see: never having to give myself a shot.)
• I’m glad that I’m not allergic to chocolate.
• I’m ecstatic that I no longer have to recruit, hire and retain tow truck drivers.
• I’m glad that I don’t have that condition where you can’t taste food.
• I’m glad that they don’t laugh at me when I show up at the health club.
• I’m glad that I live somewhere where hurricanes, tornadoes, big hail, and drought are seen only on the news.
• I’m very thankful that in all my years of hunting I haven’t been walking through the woods and found some of those stick figures hanging in the trees like in the Blair Witch Project.
• I’m glad that I’ve never mixed alcohol with karaoke. So far.
• I’m happy that I never purchased or possessed a piece of music by Michael Jackson.
• I’m thankful that I’ve never had a migraine.
• I’m glad that I don’t really have to remember my high school locker combination.
• I’m glad that I don’t like or have to eat hummus.
• I’m glad that I stopped smoking a long time ago, and never restarted.
• I’m glad that I never replaced my 8-iron after I lost it 10 years ago, and it hasn’t made one bit of difference in my golf score.
• I’m glad that we don’t have a litter box in our house – the cats go outside. If they don’t make it back in, that’s their problem.
• I’m glad that I don’t know another language. I’m already too confused in English.
• I’m glad that I don’t have to write these blog entries, but that I get to anyway.
I hope your Thanksgiving was a joyous affair, and I hope your Half-Thanksgiving is even better.